Burnout in Perimenopause with ADHD: Why You Feel So Tired (and What to Do About It)
You’ve always been the one holding it all together. Even when it felt like you were juggling too much, you somehow kept all the balls in the air. But lately? It’s different. You’re exhausted in a way that sleep doesn’t fix. The smallest task feels huge. You’re forgetting things, snapping at people you love, and wondering: What is wrong with me?
If you’re in perimenopause and living with ADHD, this isn’t just “stress.” It could be burnout. And you’re not alone.
Why ADHD and Perimenopause Make Burnout More Likely
Burnout isn’t just about being tired. It’s a deep state of emotional, physical, and mental depletion and women with ADHD in perimenopause are especially vulnerable. Why?
🌿 Hormonal shifts make ADHD symptoms harder to manage. Estrogen, which supports dopamine and serotonin (key players for focus and mood), starts to fluctuate wildly in perimenopause. Your ADHD brain, already working overtime, suddenly has less support.
🌿 Emotional regulation takes a hit. You may notice more irritability, anxiety, or even tearfulness. Those big feelings can spiral into self-criticism and shame.
🌿 The mental load grows heavier. Between work, family, aging parents, and your own health changes, it can feel like there’s no room to breathe. Your nervous system stays on high alert until it finally… collapses.
🌿 Perfectionism and masking. Many ADHD women have spent decades masking their struggles, working twice as hard to seem “together.” Perimenopause unravels those coping strategies, leaving you raw and overwhelmed.
This isn’t a personal failure. It’s biology, life stage, and years of invisible labor colliding.
Signs of Burnout in ADHD + Perimenopause
So how do you know if it’s burnout? Here are some common signs women describe:
✨ Emotional signs:
Feeling numb or detached (“I just don’t care anymore”)
Irritability or anger over small things
Overwhelming sadness or hopelessness
✨ Physical signs:
Constant fatigue, even after rest
Headaches, body aches, or frequent illnesses
Sleep changes (too much, too little, or restless sleep)
✨ Mental signs:
Forgetfulness and brain fog
Trouble making decisions
Feeling like every task is “too much”
If this sounds familiar, pause and take a deep breath. Your body and brain are waving a red flag because they need care, not because you’re weak or failing.
How to Support Yourself Through Burnout
You deserve support, not more pressure. Here are steps that can help:
💗 Name it without shame. Saying, “I’m burned out” can feel scary, but it’s the first step toward change. You’re allowed to need rest.
💗 Prioritize basics. Eat regularly. Drink water. Sleep as much as you can. ADHD brains tend to hyperfocus on “fixing” things so start small instead.
💗 Reduce the mental load. Delegate where you can. Let go of perfection. (That laundry pile? It can wait.)
💗 Connect with others. Isolation worsens burnout. Talk to someone who understands, whether it’s a friend, therapist, or support group.
💗 Consider your hormones. Talk with a healthcare provider about how perimenopause may be affecting your ADHD symptoms. MHT (menopause hormone therapy) or other supports may help.
💗 Get professional support. Therapy with someone who understands ADHD and perimenopause can help you break the cycle of shame and overwhelm.
You Are Not Broken
It’s not “just you.” Burnout in ADHD and perimenopause is real and it’s heavy. But it’s also a signal: your body is asking for compassion, not criticism. You don’t have to push through alone.
If you’re ready to name the burnout and find your way back to yourself, I’m here to help. Together, we can untangle the overwhelm and build a way forward that actually feels doable.
